The Daily Struggle
Are you waking up every morning praying for the universe to be kind to you, just giving you enough time and energy to survive the day? Not knowing where to start or what to do? With so many chores and responsibilities, you try to handle everything and make sure you are still alive at the end? And the month goes by, and then a year passes, and you are still in survival mode?
Juggling personal projects, motherhood, work life, and how to show up in your relationships can make you think there's no space for authenticity. Thinking about a life where you put yourself first, make self-care a priority, and live a life that you truly enjoy sounds like a crazy idea out of the card. And at this stage, oh well, you even know what it would look like!
Changing Your Mindset
With this mindset, you treat your life as if it is a big chore. Suck it up and bear with it, because in the end, there’s no time to waste dreaming about a great life. Even because dreaming is for the ones that have time and money to do it, and in your case, you are not the lucky one, right?
NO! That couldn't be further from the truth. Life is the biggest gift you could ever receive, given to you with your birth, and that's where you jumped into the group of the lucky ones. Life doesn't come with any guarantees, so take every day as a gift. Each day lasts 24 hours for everyone.
As the days go by, we start to experience life in many different ways, and as fair as life is, everyone goes through lovely things and also some that are hard to cope with. Sometimes so hard that they create an emotional response of stress, denial, or fright. Everyone, in this life, will have to cope with traumas. You, me, everyone.
Embracing Your Gifts
And here goes one more gift: As humans, we have a great capacity for healing from traumas. Most developed societies can, in the majority of cases, guarantee that when we look for help, we will find it. We are supported.
You might argue that this isn’t true because many people can’t reach for help and feel powerless. Yes, this is true, but if you are here reading this, YOU can. So, you are gifted one more time.
And what are you doing with all your gifts? Now imagine that your life is like your favourite dish, where you have the certainty that this is going to end, whether you want it to or not. Are you savouring it, enjoying every bite, every flavour? Or are you swallowing it whole, burning your mouth, and hurrying to finish it quickly to move on to the next task?
Let me tell you something: There’s no next task.
Taking Responsibility for Your Life
You have just one life to fill with the most amazing things you can ever imagine. You have the capacity and creativity to learn anything and everything you need to conquer all your dreams.
You can choose to live a life that is meaningful for you and your loved ones. You can choose to be your best so everyone around you can benefit. You can choose to create something authentic to you. What are you choosing? There are no excuses; when the time is up, it will be all over.
Life is like a play; when the curtains come down, the character cannot come back to the stage to fix something they did wrong.
If you were your own spectator, how proud would you be of the spectacle of life you created? Are you going to say that you did your best and made it amazing, or are you going to blame the producers, saying that the light wasn’t right and the support team was useless?
Practical Steps to a Remarkable Life
Now, let me tell you how you can start creating the best play of your life ever!
Take responsibility. Understand that you are the project and the project manager.
Start by making a list of everything you like in your life and how you can create more of it. List everything you don’t like and how you can change it.
It can look impossible when you look at your survival routine. You might think, "If my partner was a bit more helpful... If my kids were a bit calmer... If my mom was less demanding... If I could at least have some peace without having to carry everything on my back! Just 5 minutes of peace and self-care, and it would all be different."
Well, let me tell you: It’s up to you to have it all.
Let's look at three tools that will help you start creating a life where you can have more time, peace, and happiness.
Time Management
Grab a pen and paper, and ideally an agenda or calendar app (I use both).
Start by writing down every single task you need to get done in the week, dump it all. Then create a routine with the tasks you can’t move around, like taking the kids to school, work, or doctor appointments. Make these time blocks.
Go back to the list and write down how much time each task will take and how important it is to get done. Now, in your agenda, start fitting them in, considering the ones with high importance first and leaving the non-urgent ones for the end.
Consider doing a two-week plan if your worklog is too big to fit in a week. Also, list ways you can get help and who could be your saviour, and reach out to them. Maybe your best friend could pick up your kids one day, giving you time to finish that work project.
Be creative and open to receiving help. Finishing your day with your to-do list done will make you feel great, accomplished, and motivated.
Assertive Communication
Take a few minutes a day to learn how to communicate your needs and feelings clearly, directly, and respectfully. Getting the help you want from your partner will depend on how you express it. This will also create boundaries to keep your mom from consuming your time with needs that she can manage herself or could wait for when you have the capacity.
Here’s a big tip: whenever someone asks for your help, default to, "I will look at my schedule and let you know." This gives you time to see if you have the capacity to help. If you don’t, don’t try to save the world; say no.
Assertiveness is a time-generating skill; confidently expressing yourself will grant you much more cooperation from everyone around you, including your kids.
Self-Care
An empty cup doesn't fill another one. Plan at least 15 minutes a day for self-care.
It looks different for everyone, so go for whatever fills your cup. Have a warm bath, go for a walk by yourself, listen to your favourite podcast, or go out with your bestie for some fun. (Be mindful if you like a few drinks; going too hard can result in a tough morning and mess up your intentionally planned week.)
I can't express more how physical exercise, meditation, and journaling are crucial for your body and mental fitness. Move, quiet, write.
Creating some me-time is non-negotiable to embrace the world with the capacity to serve everyone you love, so take it seriously.
Creating a Remarkable Life
There's one more thing I want to tell you about making this life remarkable: it takes courage and discipline.
Apart from sunrises and sunsets, nothing great is created overnight. It will take time. Reach out for what inspires you to be your best self, imagine how you will feel when you have it all, and remember that every action you take towards it will make you stronger and closer to living your dream life.
Happiness and fulfilment are feelings that can only be created inside of you, so don't try to look for them in others. Be the change you want and ask yourself: How can I feel it now? Start creating a life you love by feeling as if you already have it. By doing this, your inner guide will have the right coordinates to take you there.
And If you ready to take responsibility and create a remarkable life and want the support, strategy and inspiration to get there more assertively, book a free call now and let's get you started! I will love to be part of this journey.
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